


(i didn't know you were so) dark inside

by alxndrlightwoods



Series: dark inside [1]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Anal Sex, Biting, Blood Kink, Consent Issues, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Dom Jace Wayland, Dom/sub, Double Agents, Emotional Manipulation, First Kiss, Friends to Lovers, Hand Jobs, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Underage, Implied/Referenced Underage Drinking, Kissing, Loss of Virginity, M/M, Murder, Nipple Torture, One-Sided Alec Lightwood/Jace Wayland, POV Jace Wayland, Painplay, Parabatai Bond, Pining Alec Lightwood, Soul Bond, Sub Alec Lightwood, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-18
Updated: 2020-03-18
Packaged: 2021-02-28 20:28:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23193217
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alxndrlightwoods/pseuds/alxndrlightwoods
Summary: The only reason Jace doesn't panic when Alec catches him — beyond the fact that his father trainedpanicout of him a long time ago — is because it'sAlec, and Jace has always been holding his leash. Even if Alec doesn't know it.
Relationships: Alec Lightwood/Jace Wayland
Series: dark inside [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1667446
Comments: 13
Kudos: 146
Collections: DL;DR: Shadowhunters Fic, SHBingo





	(i didn't know you were so) dark inside

**Author's Note:**

> For my "Best Friends to Lovers" square for Shadowhunter's Bingo.
> 
> All three "Implied/Referenced" tags are in relation to a vampire who likes preying on drunk girls. While what they do with the girls is open to interpretation, but I'm tagging to be safe. The vampire is dead and their proclivities only a passing mention.

Jace thinks, that if his father was here, he would… well. Jace  _ knows _ that he’d end up bed-ridden for a day or three, even with the use of an  _ iratze. _

Because Jace has been  _ sloppy. _

He turns more fully to face the intruder —  _ Alec,  _ he reminds himself, it’s  _ Alec —  _ the  _ witness _ to Jace’s… less than sanctioned activity.

More precisely, the dead body at his feet.

Alec is a wraith in the moonlight, skin pale and eyes shadowed. Jace watches the bob of his Adam’s apple as he swallows.

Jace wonders what’s running through his head. Does he want to run or does he want an explanation? He eyes the distance between them and doesn’t like his chances of catching Alec, if he chooses to run.

“Jace? What’s—” Alec’s voice is soft, hesitant. He cuts himself off, tongue darting out to lick his parted lips as he stares at Jace.

Jace flicks his butterfly knife closed and slips it in his jacket before taking a slow step closer to Alec, hands clear and empty at his sides.

Alec holds his ground. Jace watches him carefully as he takes another step closer.

“What’s going on?” Alec voices, and Jace halts his progress closer to his parabatai.

There are a lot of things Jace can say here. He has excuses — explanations, really, like the fact that this particular vampire has a special fondness for drunk girls with fake IDs — but it’s  _ Alec _ that’s found him.

_ Always use whatever tools are at your disposal, Jonathan, _ he hears, his father’s voice echoing in his ears.

Jace doesn’t really  _ need _ excuses or explanations, with Alec.

He softens his posture. The next step he takes forward is more of a  _ prowl _ and he lets a smirk spread across his face. The one he usually reserves for pretty girls when he wants them to know he’s thinking about what they’ll sound like when they scream.

He hears Alec’s breath catch in the quiet.

Alec  _ does _ take a step back this time, wavering and apprehensive.

“Alec,” Jace chides, the first word he’s spoken since he’d caught on to the fact that he had an  _ observer. _ His tone is taunting. Disappointed. He watches Alec arrest himself halfway through taking another step back and feels his smile gain teeth.

“Alec,” he says again, and pitches his voice low. Purrs out his parabatai’s name. Watches Alec’s breath catch in his throat. Hears him cut off a surprised little moan. The sound sends shivers of heat down his spine.

The night is hot. Jace is already a mess and he can see sweat gathering at Alec’s temples, even though all the other man is doing is standing there.

There’s blood smeared on his fingers and glove when he raises his hand to Alec’s face and brushes his fingers across Alec’s cheek. He sets his thumb on Alec’s bottom lip.

Alec’s tongue darts out again and brushes over the pad of Jace’s thumb. The wet heat searing across his skin goes straight to his dick. Jace wraps his other hand around the back of Alec’s neck and pulls him in for a kiss.

Alec’s never kissed anyone before. Jace already knows this, but what he didn’t know is how  _ eager _ Alec was going to be. He’s clumsy. He doesn’t know what to do with his hands and his teeth catch on Jace’s top lip, adding fresh blood to their kiss. But he shudders in Jace’s grip when Jace squeezes the back of his neck. Opens up his mouth to Jace’s tongue when Jace licks away the blood he left on Alec’s lips. Moans out Jace’s name when Jace pulls his hand away from Alec’s cheek and flicks open the button of his leather pants. His cock is hard and aching under Jace’s hand when he bucks his hips up into Jace’s touch.

“Shhh,” Jace croons, breaking the kiss. He tastes his own blood when he licks his lips. “I’ve got you.”

“Jace—” Alec gasps out. Jace can’t really fault him. He’s never been touched like this before.

Jace licks up the blood he left smeared on Alec’s cheek. He squeezes Alec’s neck and his cock at the same time and feels Alec almost buckle under his hands.

“Are you going to be quiet for me?” Jace asks. He’s not talking about Alec’s level of noise. They’re isolated enough that no one would hear Alec if he screamed.

Alec wavers. He wants to talk. Ask questions.

But he wants Jace to touch him more.

He gives a jerky little nod, eyes wide. He looks a little sick, even as he gives in.

Alec has always played by the rules. Part of that is just how he’s wired. The other part is the fact that everyone will care more than they really should, about where Alec wants to stick his dick, if they ever find out.

Jace has made himself Alec’s weak spot, since he noticed Alec’s crush. Played it up just enough that Alec can’t help but chase after him but thinks it’s all an accident, that Jace doesn’t  _ know. _

Jace was never going to pass up opportunity like this. His father has trained him too well for that.

Jace doesn’t bother to hide his grin, pleased and predatory now, now that he’s caught Alec. Alec’s lips part and his eyes go even darker with arousal.

Jace presses forward, backing Alec up until he hits the nearby chain fence. It rattles under the weight of their bodies pressing against it.

Jace kisses him again, which isn’t any different than kissing any of the girls he has in the past. Alec’s taller than him, which is something he doesn’t normally have to work around, but he’s  _ eager. _ He parts his lips for Jace and mimics his motions, trying to learn.

Jace scrapes his teeth over Alec’s tongue and his dick jerks when Alec  _ moans, _ torn over the sting of pain and his inability to tell whether he likes or not.

“Turn around,” Jace tells him, pulling away. Alec is still for a moment, brain not working at full speed. His face is flushed and his lips are red.

He’s pretty. Jace thinks he likes it.

Alec flushes darker when Jace makes an impatient little motion with his fingers and turns around. He hooks his fingers through the chain links of the fence to support himself. Smart of him, considering his reaction to Jace’s hand on his cock  _ through leather _ earlier.

Jace plasters himself to Alec’s back and flicks the button of Alec’s pants open before pulling the zip down slowly. Alec holds his breath, the muscles of his back trembling where he’s pressed against Jace. Jace can hear the tiny little almost moan he makes at the sound of the zipper’s teeth as Jace slides it down.

“You’re already gagging for it and I’ve barely even touched you,” Jace taunts, breathing the words into Alec’s ear. The protesting little whine Alec lets out makes him laugh. He nips Alec’s earlobe to distract him. “What makes you think that’s a turn off, Alec?” he admonishes.

He can feel the deep breath Alec takes then breathes outs, his parabatai relaxing under him. So tense, and while Jace knows why, it’s good that Alec still trusts in him enough to start to let go.

He doesn’t want to have to do anything drastic.

He bites Alec’s bare neck as he slips his hand into Alec’s pants.

The fence creaks under Alec’s fingers as he groans and bucks into Jace’s hand. Jace smiles against Alec’s skin and curls the fingers of his free hand into the same links as Alec, pinning his hand. Alec bucks into his hand again as Jace starts to stroke him, twisting his wrist and squeezing just under the crown.

“Is this how you touch yourself?” he murmurs into Alec’s ear. He tightens his hand on Alec’s when he doesn’t get an answer. “Answer me,” he orders.

“N-no,” Alec gasps out.

Jace hums and spreads the precome leaking steadily from Alec’s cock over the head. “Then tell me,” the words an order disguised as an invitation.

“Sl-slower,” Alec stutters out, arching up on his toes when Jace slows down the pace of his strokes in response to Alec’s words. “An-and nails—”

Alec’s voice cuts off into a strangled moan when Jace runs his nails down the underside of Alec’s cock before stroking up again. He lets his thumbnail graze under the glans before repeating the motion.

“I should have known you’d like when it hurts a little,” Jace purrs into his ear, dipping his nail into Alec’s weeping slit this time. Alec keens and Jace feels him almost buckle. “You always love it when I mark you up while we spar.”

“Just a little, ah—” Alec agrees, voice breaking on the last word when Jace digs his nails in harder to see what Alec will do.

Alec squirms, trying to get away from the pain, but Jace has him trapped. He gentles his fingers and goes back to taking Alec apart the way Alec says he likes. “I don’t want to hurt you, Alec,” Jace whispers the confession against Alec’s skin, closing his eyes and resting his head in the crook of Alec’s neck.

Alec shudders against him. The noise he makes is half pleasure and half denial.

Jace presses a kiss behind his ear. “Shh,” he soothes, squeezing Alec’s hand. “I won’t, if you're good. Don’t you want to be good for me, Alec?”

“Yes,” Alec moans. He’s thrusting into Jace’s grip now instead of Jace jerking him off, chasing the little lines of pain Jace’s nails give him.

“I would take such good care of you,” Jace promises. “If you let me.”

“Do you want that?” Jace continues idly.

“Please, sir,” Alec gasps out before going deathly still under him.

Jace has done the same.

He can’t  _ breathe _ through the arousal that spikes through him at the words, lightheaded with it.

He’d had no plans to fuck Alec. Get him off, sure, and have Alec get him off; his dick could be a treat Alec would have, if he was good and kept quiet. He’d have made that clear, that this could continue if Alec kept his fucking mouth shut.

Now, though.

Now he wants to hear Alec call him that again.

The fence creaks as Alec tightens his grip on the metal, knuckles white.

“Jace—” Alec starts, voice wavering, but Jace makes a disapproving noise low in his throat and Alec shuts up.

He plasters himself against Alec’s back and presses a hand to his abdomen, the button of Alec’s pants cool against his palm. Alec makes a pained little noise as he presses down hard enough that it digs into Alec’s skin.

“Jace,” Alec gasps out again. Jace makes another negative noise.

He slips his hand under Alec’s shirt. Alec’s skin is sweat-slick under his fingers as he trails his hand up Alec’s chest. Alec’s muscles jerk under the light touch as his chest heaves.

He rubs his thumb over one of Alec’s nipples before he catches it between his thumb and forefinger and  _ twists. _

Alec arches up in an attempt to get away from Jace’s fingers and the pain, but all he does is rattle the fence. His ass rubs against Jace’s dick as he does. Jace groans and grinds his hips against Alec’s ass, chasing the feel of it.

“You said you di-didn’t—” Alec tries to say, before crying out when Jace twists harder in retaliation.

He doesn’t let up, pinching and twisting Alec’s nipple between his fingers even as Alec starts up a litany of his name and pleas for him to  _ stop. _

“Jace, _stop. Sir,_ _please—”_ Alec gasps out, finally saying the word Jace has been waiting to hear. Jace licks the sweat off his neck as he lets go of Alec’s abused nipple, soothing his thumb over the heated flesh.

Alec goes limp underneath him, whimpering slightly and trying in vain to hide it.

Jace trails his fingers across Alec’s chest and over his other nipple.

“Sir, please don’t—” Alec starts to beg, voice hoarse. He hasn’t caught his breath yet and his voice catches on the words, preventing him from getting them all out.

He sounds gorgeous.

“No?” Jace repeats, digging his nail lightly into Alec’s nipple. It draws a sharp gasp from the man under him, Alec arching into the sensation this time instead of away. “Then what?”

A rough groan tears it’s way out of Alec’s throat when Jace digs his nail in harder. 

Alec doesn’t respond until Jace has gone back to  _ pain, _ the pain he doesn’t like. Not until he’s pinching Alec’s nipple and Alec  _ gives up, _ going limp instead of fighting it. Not until Alec is whining under his breath but  _ taking it. _

“Fuck me, please,” Alec whimpers when he has the breath to speak again, face turned away. Then he continues, voice catching in his throat and shaking with arousal and pain, “Sir.”

Jace pulls his hand away from where their fingers had been tangled together in the fence to turn Alec’s face so they can kiss. He licks into Alec’s mouth, slick and  _ wet, _ as he brushes his palm down Alec’s stomach to shove his hand down Alec’s pants again. He tastes blood where Alec bit his cheek to force himself to take the pain Jace had given him.

“I don’t want to hurt you,” Jace repeats, answering Alec’s earlier aborted question. “But that means giving me what I want, Alec.”

He kisses Alec again, swallowing any words Alec might have tried to say. “That’s it,” he murmurs as he pulls away after Alec has gone languid underneath him. He licks the taste of Alec’s blood off his lips. “Just be good for me.”

“Yes sir,” Alec whispers, ducking his head down. He shudders again when Jace rewards him with a kiss.

He chases after Jace’s lips when Jace pulls away. Jace smirks and tips Alec’s chin up. “So you want me to fuck you, Alec?” he asks. It’s a mean tease, but one Jace can’t help but take pleasure in.

Alec nods against his fingers, eyes trained on Jace’s. So quick to pick up on what Jace wants — although part of that is the fact that he always focuses his attention on Jace, when Jace is in the room.

He presses his fingers to Alec’s lips, hissing in pleasure as Alec sucks on them. Jace wonders what the blood on them tastes like. When his fingers are wet enough, he pulls them away. Alec turns around without being told this time, hooking his fingers into the fence again as Jace shoves down his pants and presses spit-slick fingers against his hole.

He doesn’t bother with one. Alec likes the bite of pain, and Jace is  _ impatient, _ impatient to hear Alec gasping in pleasure, impaled on Jace’s cock. He opens Alec up, more than familiar with the process from experience with some of the girls he’s fucked before. Alec jerks underneath his hands when Jace grazes his prostate.

“Did you ride your fingers like this, thinking of me?” Jace asks as he pulls his fingers free and digs into his pocket for one of the condoms he keeps on him, just in case.

Alec gasps out what’s clearly an agreement, distracted by the sound of the foil tearing open. Jace smirks as he rolls it on and gives himself a few strokes before lining the blunt head of his cock up to Alec’s hole.

“Relax,” he murmurs into Alec’s ear, fingers gripped loosely around his cock as he slowly pushes in.

Alec takes him in easily, and that more than anything tells Jace that Alec has been less innocent than Jace always believed. “Fuck,” he curses. “How big is the toy you use, Alec?”

Because there’s no other explanation for how easily Alec opens up for him. Alec is hot and tight around his cock and Jace can’t help the jerk of his hips as he seats himself fully in Alec’s ass. The drag is drier than he would like, but Alec doesn’t seem to mind, the way he’s moaning and clenching down on Jace’s cock.

“Sm-smaller than you are—” Alec gets out, before Jace steals away his ability to speak with the pace he sets. Jace bites down on Alec’s shoulder to muffle his moans, tasting sweat-soaked cloth and the faint heat of Alec’s skin.

Alec probably likes  _ slow _ here, too. But Jace doesn’t want slow. And he doesn’t think Alec wants slow at the moment, not this time.

Jace has their fingers tangled again, his hands overtop Alec’s where they’re latched through the fence with a death grip. The sounds he fucks out of Alec — whimpers, moans, frustrated whines at the way the fence bends under them — build and coil with the heat seeping through him.

Jace is hot, overheated; their shirts are soaked with sweat where Jace is pressed against Alec’s back. He soaks Alec’s shirt further when he buries his face in Alec’s shoulder, the fabric still trapped between his teeth. The taste on his tongue is blood-sweet.

He didn’t expect to like it this much. Jace has done anal with girls who liked it before. Hell, he’s done anal with girls who had prostates before, but he’s never fucked someone who was as into getting fucked by him as Alec is. How  _ into him _ Alec is, how much he’s clearly wanted this, his  _ years _ of wanting this, is a novelty he’s not sure will ever wear off. Not for either of them.

There’s liquid gold gushing through his bloodstream. His blood feels thick and hot, too heavy in his veins. Heat is coiled in his belly and there’s a heavy pressure building in his balls as he grinds his cock into Alec, as deep and close as he can get.

He sinks his teeth into the meat of Alec’s shoulder when he comes, gold flaring behind his eyelids as Alec groans in a mix of pleasure and frustration under him.

Jace stays where he is, forehead pressed against Alec’s shoulder as he catches his breath. He feels fuck stupid and  _ slow, _ like he’s been having sex for much longer than he actually has,  _ came _ more than once.

Alec makes a bitten off noise under him, shoving back against Jace and clenching down on Jace’s softening cock. Jace hisses at the pleasure-pain of the overstimulation.

“You’re so fucking impatient,” Jace hisses, pulling out carefully with his fingers wrapped around the base of the condom. He ties it off and steps away to toss it onto the body. It’ll burn up with the rest of it when he gets to it.

Tucking himself back into his pants, he turns back to Alec and meets his gaze. Alec’s face is still pressed against the fence and his fingers linked through it.  _ Good. _ Jace wouldn’t have let him get away with moving without permission. He raises an eyebrow anyway. “Not going to apologise?”

Jace can see how his muscles are quaking as he holds himself still, fingers white and trembling. Alec’s cock is trapped between his body and the fence and Jace wonders idly if it pinches. “So-sorry, sir,” Alec pants out. 

Jace hums in approval. “Turn around,” he orders.

Alec does. Jace watches the way his chest heaves. He lets his eyes wander down Alec’s body before stepping forward to wrap his hand around Alec’s hard cock, the tip red and weeping. Alec moans and bucks up into Jace’s grip. The fence creaks and protests from how hard Alec is gripping it.

Jace dips his head to suck on Alec’s nipple through his shirt. Alec jerks underneath him as Jace sucks, the wet fabric abrasive on his already sore chest. Alec keens and tries to press back into the fence to get away from Jace’s mouth even as he thrusts up into Jace’s hand.

Jace takes pity on him and pulls back to shove Alec’s shirt up, gathering up the material and pressing it to Alec’s mouth. Alec bites down on it and throws his head back.

Jace leans down to lick Alec’s nipple, still red and sore looking from earlier. Jace can feel how pain-hot it is as he runs his tongue over it. He smirks as he tightens his grip on Alec’s cock.

And bites down.

Alec’s scream is muffled by the fabric in his mouth as his body jerks like he’s touched a livewire. Jace curls his palm over the head of Alec’s cock to feel the wet spurts of Alec’s release and the way Alec’s cock twitches with the force of his orgasm.

He soothes the hurt with his tongue as Alec’s cock gives a final weak twitch in his grip and starts when he tastes blood. He tilts his head down to look and finds blood welling from the imprint of his teeth around the edges of Alec’s nipple. He brushes his thumb through it then licks the smear off as he looks up to find Alec watching.

Alec looks wrecked. There are tear tracks on his face and Jace can see how red his lips are when Alec lets the shirt fall out of his mouth.

“Stay,” Jace orders. He steps away and hears Alec let his head fall back against the fence again, rattling it. He pulls his stele out and sketches a fire rune on the dead vampire’s cheek. The body goes up like kindling and the scent of ash wafts up from it immediately as it crumbles into nothingness under the magical flames.

Alec hasn’t moved. His shirt is halfway down his chest and his cock is still hanging out of his fly, soft and streaked with come. A quick look down at his own body shows streaks of come on his jeans.

Jace cages Alec with his body again as he tucks Alec back in his pants and pulls his shirt down. Alec’s hands come away from the fence to hover over his hips. He settles them there when Jace leans in to kiss him again.

Jace glances his lips off of Alec’s, slow kisses that he doesn’t let deepen. It doesn’t take many for Alec to gain confidence, moving his hands away from Jace’s hips to wrap them around his neck instead.

Jace puts his mouth next to Alec’s ear. “You’re mine,” Jace promises, voice low and intent. A shiver runs through Alec at the declaration. He knows Alec hears it differently than Jace actually means it.

He has Alec hooked now. He’ll keep Jace’s secret.

Nothing else matters.

**Author's Note:**

> Come join us on [discord](https://discord.gg/RhZPtsd).
> 
> This series will eventually be Jace/Alec/Sebastian (Morgenstern).


End file.
